I am a 46 years old male. I am suffering from erictile dysfunction sometime and find it hard to penetrate. My wife is 28 years old and I feel she is quite dissatisfied with my performance.

I am middle class executive and have reasonable amount of workload at office. I do not think this is the cause of my deteroriating sexual life.

I do not suffer from any congenital disease nor do I hve any serious family history.

please help.

By An Irishman on Monday, December 11, 2000 - 08:29 am:

Shankar,
Erectile dysfunction in men and frigidity in women are both very common problems.....and they are both HIGHLY CUREABLE. Please see a board-certified physican, who can prescribe medication to get you
through this period of your life.

Erectile dysfunction isn't always a permanent
problem, and sometimes it goes away by itself.
However, it is best to seek treatment in order
to still have sexual relations until the
real cause of the problem can be determined.
Remember, stay away from all types of injectibles
(shots) because viagra is much more effective for
this, without damage caused by injectible medication.

Both men and women benefit from viagra.

Good luck.

By pshah on Wednesday, January 17, 2001 - 06:45 am:

Sex is best in your 40's. one is so relaxed and aware of ones body /sexuality, that you enjoy the act of sex as never before. you can sense the feeling of enjoyment.

By kumbh on Saturday, January 27, 2001 - 07:33 pm:

From a man's point of view sexual activity after 40 is more an art and pleasure than a merely a physical activity. you must care for your diet and lots of vigorous exercises to keep fit.

My question is it true that many men lose their interest in sex after 40?

By Anonymous on Monday, January 29, 2001 - 04:08 am:

My husband is 49 years old and is still very interested in sex. We make love almost every night and it is better than ever. He does exercise and is in excellent physical condition. I have not noticed any decrease in his sexual desire.

By mister35 on Monday, January 29, 2001 - 06:40 pm:

Anonymous,

I have about a 100 questions for you, so please try and answer as many as you can; I have been looking for a couple like you for some time. So here goes:

You said your husband is 49; how old are you? If you are 40+, I am interested in knowing about your sex drive. In general I want to know how sex changes for women in their 40's. My guess is that you have not yet reached menopause, is that right. How do you rate your desire for sex compared to when you were in your 20's and 30's. Also how does your body respond to sex, do you take longer to arouse, does it take different things to arouse you? Do you have kids? Are they teenagers, with sexual lives of their own? How does that affect your (and your husband's) sexual responses?

I am a 35 year old married guy, and right now my wife and I enjoy great sex. I am just worried about how things will change in a few years, hence the questions.

Thanks for taking the time to answer.

By Anonymous on Tuesday, January 30, 2001 - 05:44 am:

mister35,
I am also in my forties and I would rate my sexual desire as the strongest that it has ever been. much greater than in my twenties. My husband and I have two children in their twenties. We experienced an enormous increase in sexual desire and satisfaction upon reaching our forties. Perhaps the freedom of no longer having children at home because they had left for college was the reason, or having reached financial and job security or just the security of a long term marriage, I do not know. You asked about arousal ..it is much easier and faster now ..there is no distraction of worrying about children. We are as two young lovers who are now experienced, it could not be better. I wish the same for you and your wife.

By jogo on Wednesday, February 28, 2001 - 12:32 pm:

What is Erectile dysfunction in men and frigidity in women. Are there any symptoms.

By Anonymous on Thursday, March 08, 2001 - 08:40 am:

Do not forget frequent bathing, deodorant or brushing teeth and washing hair, especially before lovemaking, but daily will make one more appealing. Clean clothes and a clean bed are necessary. Light cologne and perhaps candles or dim lighting might enhance the setting regardless of age.

Getting older isn't the problem. It is the getting taken foregranted and the quality of the years together that can cause good or bad sex in relationships.

By Anonymous on Thursday, March 08, 2001 - 08:28 am:

To Jogo: Erectile dysfunction means you cannot reach orgasm; your penis will be soft and you will to one degree or another not be able to finish a normal sexual union or it might take so long that both of you will be exhausted or annoyed from the experience. And it will not end with any semen being dispersed or that may happen but not when you want it to. It can be caused by prostate trouble or from psychological problems or emotional disorders. Seeing a physician is probably the best thing to do to rule out organic illness. A physician that you trust to talk to about personal matters would be best.

About sex after 40
Although menopause causes dryness and medications can also do this; illness might make it difficult or impossible, many older couples I know enjoy sex into their later years. Sometimes the man or woman does not want it as often as in younger years, but I am sure that is variable. Depression and distrust are the two biggest killers of sexual desire.
If one has a partner they trust who trusts them there are less difficulties. I believe yoga is a great help to sexual function as well as being careful to watch one's diet and not drink, smoke or otherwise be intemperate.
I believe sex is best in a loving permanent union. It would seem that Indians with rich cultural heritage, ancient wise philosophies, many wonderful religious and family traditions would best be able to maintain this, but western influence has had some bad effect on these things. Many of the best things of India are forgotten by many.
Consideration and caring in a union will bring about a good sex life. Talk of how many times to have the sex and neglect of the relationship show a shallow idea that sex is best with new exciting partners--but for how long and to what end?
Stds, HIV infection even with condoms,loss of trust from one's spouse or the one with whom you are engaged to are all bad things that will make future sex unhappy. I know of some Indian men who seek sex with younger and younger women when they are working overseas. They think it is thrilling even though they find the young women ugly and fat. What happens when they return home?! I have heard of Indian men who spend much money on prostitutes and become addicted to these uncommitted sort of relationships, unable to marry because they love the constant change of partners and cannot give themselves to one partner. Oh, they have money, and they have good jobs, but will they ever have that one person who waits for them and them alone, someone who wants only them and trusts them completely, someone who would be there if they lost their fine jobs and all their money? Prostitutes only want a man's money. A man who sees prostitutes is a man a woman should be leary of for that very reason.
Think carefully about who you want to have sex with and why and less about the pleasure. The pleasure will develop over time more fully and be there more consistently, I believe, if both partners are monogamous and strive to please each other in more ways than just in the bedroom.

By Anonymous on Monday, May 28, 2001 - 11:13 pm:

I am 39 yr old single Indian,in good physcial condtion and I exercise reg. and eat well. For the past yr. I have experienced erictile dysfunciton. I have a hard time sustaining an errection and often cannot satisfy my partners. I want to get married however I fear no partner will find me desireable due to my sexual shortcomings. What should I do.

By Anonymous on Wednesday, June 27, 2001 - 11:40 am:

hi, iam51 indian male. my wife is 50 we make sex every day. there is no problom . infact we •••• each other like we were doing it in 20s. mind is very young .

By Chandragupt on Thursday, August 30, 2001 - 10:11 pm:

Ladies and Gentlemen,
Stimulaton is a key to a colossol sex life. Fantasize and dream the hell out. Imagine you are making love to your favorite person whom you adore and vice versa let your partner fantasize about the person she desires the most. Be the person she wants you to be and you be the person he wants you to be. Give and take..I'll bet you any money her's will be wet and sloppy and you will have no erectile dysfunction in your entire life..come on guys and gals it's the new millenium and hey wanna join us....provide you can come to America. and hey Email me...believe me it is now or never......lets enjoy life...any woman or man want to be swingers email me chandragupt@yahoo.com