Learning & Protecting :Sexually Transmitted Diseases?
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Learning & Protecting :Sexually Transmitted Diseases?
Personal Hygiene is one of the least important concerns in India. India unfortunately is one of the worst countries in the world for acquired infections and diseases. Indian health agencies and local, state and federal governments have failed miserably in educating the masses in time.
The result is that within a very short time India will have the largest single group of patients of AIDS.
However, living anywhere in the world, one must be extra vigilant about personal hygiene and health. The things have become extra ordinary alarming.
Let us discuss, inform and analyse about the solutions and suggestions on how to avoid having any of such notorious and fatal diseases.
Hathoda
Princess
Joseph
Pk
I’ll take the lead to start this discussion.
Your input will make this a perfect discussion chapter, I am sure…………...
AIDS………. scary word to all of us. As an Indian living in India or in western countries, due to the difference in way we were brought up. Do you think that we know enough to protect ourselves from monster disease such as AIDS or any other sexually transmitted disease? What is happening back home in India?
What India should do to bring awareness about AIDS? I personally think discussion about sexually transmitted disease between parents and kids is very important and will be helpful. My parents never used word sex or sexual transmitted disease with us and I never tried to discuss this either. Now sometimes, I feel they should have discussed with me openly? I learned about sex and sexual transmitted diseases from different sources (other than parents) in pieces and took me a few years to achieve a level of reasonable understanding. What do you think? I think in western countries we are fully aware of the situation due to media and more education. Do you agree?
Sometimes I also feel that this issues is blown out of proportion by media in the western world. What you think? What about India? Some people may consider this discussion an issue of cultural gap between east and west or may be an assault on Indian culture.
How one should investigate sexual history of your sexual partner?
Do you think this will be considered blunt to ask for sexual history to your future life partner?
I know some of my friends are still stuck on virginity but get real. We are about to enter in to twenty 1st century.
I don’t care about virginity as long as me and my life partner are faithful after marriage.
What you think about this issue before/after selecting life partners?
Any good/bad experience you like to share.
Sometimes I think, I am the only one more concerned about this issue. What you think about this issue? Your opinion about this topic matters and MOST WELCOME.
Hathoda
Moderator
Hi Mr. Hathoda ;-),
I would like to make a comment of sex education in general. communication on sex between parents and children is always an awkward one, for any culture or religion or nationality people. I remember growing up in India we were fortunate that during our adolacent years, a film was made and was shown in the cinema halls accross the country, and it was encouraged by both parents and teachers. And it was not labelled "R". This film dealt with all aspects of sexuality and that was my one and only education- Sex 101 - on sex upto that point. I do not know if this type of educational films still comes on the screen.
Living abroad this issue requires more input from parents, specially due to dating at early age and other concepts. It is probably more comfortabely be addressed on same gender bases, if you have choice - Mother educates daughters and father educates sons. I think education on sex given in school is must, and education of conseqences of unsafe sex is even more important; specially during teen age and in case of pre-marital sex.
It is very important for parents to make kids aware of different mode of contraceptives. This is generally handlled by child's pediatrician more effectively.
It is very little known fact that hepatitis and herpes which can be transmitted much easily are also diseases which do not have cure.
Honesty practiced during your search for life partner will lead you to happiness. However, as you know, this sex subject is not discussed even in western world on first date (generalization), so you can tacle this topic successfuly without putting anyone in awkward situations.
Just onr final comment. Every individual, culture and society has somthing to offer, some may be to your liking and some not (you can define what good and bad is!). Choose what you like, and recyle the rest!
Hi Hathoda
I read your reply to Mr PK. I am a new member to the group and hence do
not know much about this chain of discussion. But when I read about some
contaminated syringes puncturing your fingers and spreading the disease,
I just remembered an old article. Well the article said that the virus
of AIDS gets destroyed within a minute of its exposer to air. Hence any
such syringe that has been contaminated would lose the affect of virus
quickly.
I am not completely sure about this but i do remember that I read the
article in a very reputed newspaper. In case this point is incorrect I
would appreciate if any body can correct me.
Also I take the opprurtunity to emphasis the point that AIDS patients
need our complete help and support.Therefore , if this point has been
initiated (by whosoever) without any strong foundation or proof ,then
this kind of malign practices should be avoided.
regards
Munish Kumar
Hi Munish,
Your information is somewhat correct. It is true that AIDS virus do not survive out side of host for longer period, say in a dry form of blood and may be not longer than 24 hrs. There are so many studies done but they fail to pinpoint down in terms of time frame. Hepatitis virus on other hand can basically survive for ever out side host body. Also AIDS virus is easily killed using household detergent like Bleach (10% of concentrate will do the trick).
The common practice is that regardless of any given condition of the object (syringe in this case), it is considered Biohazzard and so in event of such occurance, immidiately seek medical help without any speculation and they will test you for HIV, Hepatitis and other tests besides giving initial treatment.
Mr Pk thanks for providing this forum. I have a question for the more knowledgeable: I have heard that HPV or the human papillon virus has infected almost 40% of American women. Its what causes cervical cancer in women later in life. Men carry it also and pass it around. Does anyone know if this disease can be identified in men if they are not showing symptoms? And what are the symptoms anyway?
Human papillomaviruses:
Symptoms in men:
Appears in form of genital warts. Usual areas are on the end and shaft of the penis and below the foreskin - if uncircumsized, of course. The warts usually appear 1 - 6 months after infection, begaining as tiny soft, moist pink or red swellings. They grow rapidly and may form stalks. This usually can be diagnosed from the appearance but may be mistaken for sores found in secondary syphillis.
I am not in touch with recent advancement in diagnostic test for HPV, but I recall few years ago there was a blood test at research stage (serology test and not immunoassay)targeted for PV type 16 or 18, both are causative agents for cervical cancer in women. I think there may not be much research going on in this field since there are more than 1 type of PVs and there for may need panel of tests. Also lots of research in industry is govern by the revenue the product generates.
Dear Young friends, take a few minutes to read through the linked document (or go to the url below) and think again before you gamble with your precious body and soul :)
http://www.days.org/granddads.html
A serious joke
A man was fond of prostitutes or having sex with the 1st one he met.
Ik din onu ik bari badnaam ji bimari lag jandi hai. (One day he gets a very notorious disease). All doctors say his genitals will have to be amputated (katna payega).. the man is obviously very very low and down. He goes to many docs but all say similar things.
Ik dost ne kaha ke kisi chini doctor kol ja - (A friend said that Chinese doc will fix it.)
The guy is very hopeful and Dr. Hun Enu Hila - does his checking and thinks and thinks.
The man says Dr Hila - do you think it will have to be katto (cut)?
Doctor Hun Hila said - no no no....
"hain---- the bhara ji is quite pleased and says so you have an alternative then???
A very serious Doctor Hila said "Actually there is no need to cut it.. it will fall off itself in about 3 weeks."
more jokes at http://punjabi.net
Mr Joseph is a very senior scientist as i understand from my respected friend Mr Pk. I request Mr Joseph to post a brief idea on how can one protect from getting infected as this will be quite useful for young people. We have received many queries about this issue.
Any of our other readers, who can write about do's and don't etc. are invited to post such information in brief. If very long please go ahead and post and we will put that on an exclusive page on this same space.
Thanks and cheers!
It certainly is my pleasure to share my thoughts on STD and protection. I will follow this up momentarily. And please call me Joseph :-), in a classroom for learning social issues, there are no paradigms created by gender, race, age and education. We all are learning somthing.
I think most of the youths in the 90's are at least aware of how AIDS spreads and therefore paying more attention to their sexual habits. The earlier posting on this board by a well wisher contains a link to a page which discusses sexually transmitted diseases (STD) so at least it gives you an idea of how many other than AIDS types of STDs exist.
I am also aware that the upbringing in Indian culture means that most of us are brought up with the philosophy such that sex is considered special, to be shared and practiced with someone who loves and cares for you, and not made out to be cheap act. Many believe that sexual act is reserved to be practiced after marriage so abstinence of sex before marriage is widely practiced. There are many others who believe that sex is very important factor in sustaining married life and therefore is vital factor in deciding their life mate and therefore selectively practice pre - marital sex. And than there is something called "puberty" - period of sexual maturity - happens in early teen ages which makes boys and girls curious about everything sex. High surge of hormones during this phase causes this and it is normal. Due to the fatal sexually transmitted disease like AIDS, it is very important to understand that unsafe sex practice will put you at risk of death. It is also important to understand what is defined as safe sex. PRACTICE OF SAFE SEX WITH MULTIPLE PARTNERS DOES NOT MEAN YOU WILL BE 100% RISK FREE, IT REDUCES SPREAD OF DISEASES OR CHANCE OF BEING INFECTED GREATLY. Use of defective condoms for instance can put you to risk of infection.
And I want to emphasize that there is a very important issue besides life and death related to pre-marital and adolescent sex. The issue is pregnancy. This is a topic in itself and needs separate discussion. So all that is discussed now is purely from scientific standpoint and without any intention to offend religious groups, pro-life and pro-choice activists.
OVERVIEW:
Sexually Transmitted Diseases are infections that are often, if not always, passed from person to person through sexual contact. Because sexual activity provides an easy opportunity for organisms to find new hosts, a wide variety of infectious microorganisms can be spread by sexual contact. Transmission of these diseases does not require genital penetration, although usually results from having vaginal, oral or anal sex with an infected partner. Almost 3 million (250 million worldwide) Americans are infected with Gonorrhea every year. For Syphilis, 400,000 Americans (50 million world wide).
Some STDs are caused by bacteria and fungi and some by viruses. Most of the bacterial / Fungal diseases are curable (Syphilis, gonorrhea, Chlamydia etc.) and for most of the viral diseases like herpes, there are no cures, or at the most treatments to relieve symptoms are available. It is important to know that even some of these STDs may not cause you any discomfort or symptoms, these organisms can be latent in your body for years and can be fatal to fetus during pregnancy or cause severe birth defects. All these organisms tend to favor moist and worm areas to cultivate. Women can more easily catch STDs than men. Bacterial / fungal organisms can be easily transmitted just by contact of genitals where as viral infection like AIDS requires exposer to blood, e.g, skin cut or blisters or sores around genitals. AIDS virus can be present in any bodily fluids like saliva of infected person, therefore in theory can be transmitted by exchange of saliva during kissing and if you have bleeding gums or sores in mouth. There is one such inconclusive case reported so far to best of my knowledge. It shows that AIDS mode of infection is not "easy" and therefore can not be easily transmitted simply by use of public facilities, or sneezing. In any case, use of "usable" latex condoms greatly reduces risk of infection during intercourse.
PROTECTION
In terms of reducing risk of infections, use of condoms is considered the most effective way. Make sure the condoms you use are latex and high density. There were condoms in market not too long ago which were designed to stop sperms only and not viruses. What is the difference in size between sperm and AIDS virus? Think of sperm as 18 wheeler truck and AIDS virus as a Mazda Miatta. Although WHO condom specifications are 13 pages long, which ensures the efficacy and porous size of the latex, there are lots of substandard variety available which are made in south east Asia which may not give you full protection against infection. So saving money may not help save your life. It is important to know that latex is a product like milk obtained from tree sap and therefore its shelf life is not eternal. Exposure of unused condom wrapped in foil to extreme temperatures (storing in glove compartment of a car) or even just extended aging will cause these condoms to fail to protect against infection. So before use, make sure it is well lubricated, not brittle and free of any foul odor (like rotten egg). Also make sure the size fits you. Too big will slip off during intercourse and will expose you to infection.
Very often we hear that it is very difficult to get men to use condoms. Besides the usual complaints about sensitivity and lack of spontaneity, some men argue that use of condoms are against their religion (birth control issue for Catholics) or culture. Well, the consequences of not using condoms are very much clear, so guys be cool and be informed and do not risk lives of your partners and yours. It is my personal opinion that women should dictate this issue, not because "Boys will be Boys", but because women being at double risk of infection as well as pregnancy. It is not even a bad practice for women to carry condoms to ensure safety in such event. This should not be reflect upon as a women's status as "sexually active".
If you are sexually active and have multiple partners, have your self checked for STDs every few months. If you ever fear that you may have been exposed to HIV virus (AIDS), there are clinics funded by government even in your town (in USA) which will provide testing free of charge and will ensure confidentiality.
I hope this information will be of some help. I will keep posting any new developments as I come accross.
Joseph,
Can you perhaps start a discussion about how Indian parents in America can talk to their children about sex? Ofcourse that sounds like a oxymoron....Indian parents and sex in the same sentence. But in all honesty this is an issue that needs to be discussed.
There is literature available out there called "How to talk to your Children about sex" and I've read it but I tell you there was nothing in there geared toward how to get your parents to talk to you about sex.
In the Indian society "sex" is such at a taboo topic that the mere mention of it runs chills down people's spines. I'm in my mid 20's, while having grown up here sex was a topic that was simply never ever mentioned in my family. No one talked to me about it and the only thing I knew about it growing up was that "you get pregnant from it" and later on had sex education in High School. Much of what I learnt about sex came from my peers, college, personal experiences and what I saw and read.
My brother is now 20 and before he went away to college I sat him down and talked to him about sex and being responsible and STD's and gave him a stack of condoms. My father almost had a heartattack when he found out and was so ashamed of me doing that. No amount of me reasoning with him or trying to make him understand the situation would calm him down. He tried to accuse me of condoning pre-marital sex and teaching my brother the wrong lessons. He tried to talk to me about our "values". Values are learnt not inherited! Ofcourse not that my father would understand that.
I think while it's great to expect your children to abstain and teach them the responsibilities that go with sex it's nieve to think that they will indeed abstain when you've never even mentioned the word sex in front of them. We have to have a backup plan and be prepared for it.
I realized that in my father's eyes my brother who's 20 is still a child while I consider him a young man. He has a girlfriend that he openly dates and had been doing so for the past year. When I brought up that issue with my father he flipped out at me saying "That doesn't mean they are having sex and you shouldn't have taught him so". I think it's really nieve because I know that he's not exactly "praying" or "studying" with her each time they are together.
Am I being realistic or am I being paranoid? Does that make me a bad sister that I'm teaching my brother to be a responsible sexual partner by protecting himself and his girlfriend? Is my father in denial or does he really believe that my brother is abstaining from sex and I'm creating a sex fiend out of him?
Hi Princess,
Your wish is my command:)
Indeed when it comes to subject of sex, parents have difficulty handling it. And it is a universal phenomenon, may be in some culture the difficulty is at lesser degree than overs, but parents of all races, nationality, ethnicity has to face it.
I will give you my personal example. I have a 17 year old daughter. When she was about 5-6 years old, once watching TV, she asked me where does the baby come out from. My initial reaction was to get help from my wife, but I end up explaining her the best way I could. And I bet us ALL parents at one time or other are confronted with these questions by pre-adolescent children. I think right at this early age as a parent if you answer these questions, the message child gets is that she can talk to her parents regarding anything. It also sets up a good precedence.
Often children shy away from discussions because early in their lives they may have experience and concluded that either mom or dad or both are not interested in discussions. And this conclusion has lot to do with parents unwillingness to answer back all these "but why dad?" questions during child's early years.
Indian parents in particular, who grew up in India well into their adolescence before migration, need to constantly remember that their lives abroad has fast forwarded by at least three to four decades. We can not assume what we did as teen agers is what our children do now. All of a sudden, it is not one generation gap, it is two generations deep. There are new challenges, temptations these kids face now which did not exists in our days. And just the cultural philosophy difference alone is big enough that warrants talks from parents. It is important to constantly remind ourselves TO SEPERATE what you think and believe about dating, sex practices and such issues from the reality that IT STILL EXISTS and so we need to be discussing them with children. And remember, DISCUSSION is the word, not DICTATION! For example, your opposition to dating may be result of your assumption that your child will automatically be engaged in sexual intercourse. So as a parent you need to separate issue of dating and sexual intercourse. When you separate these issues and discuss accordingly, children will listen. Showing anger and imposing rules only results in a rebellious child who wants to just prove how wrong you are, which by the way, could be true from their perspective.
Things get tougher as children grow older:). Most likely, boys and girls WILL NOT initiate talk. And if they do, girls will prefer a talk with mom. At least in my house.. I get the news second hand from my wife on sex related issues. And I suspect boys prefer to talk to dad. Regarding menstrual cycle, mother MUST talk to daughter before she gets her first episode. This estimated "before"is usually determined based on mother's and her family history. And this is also a time to point out that she is a woman and now can become pregnant. For boys, purely based on scientific point of view, father (or mother) should talk about sex once they are in their early teens. Emphasize that boys are equally responsible for their actions and consequences resulting from sexual intercourse.
So most likely, it becomes totally a parental responsibility. For parents, how to initiate a talk? The first talk is very important to set the tone for subsequent talks. You have to make sure that what type of rapport you have develop over the years with your child and accordingly start the talk. The idea is to make them ask the questions and make them feel comfortable enough that if in future they have questions, they can come to you.
Statistics shows that simply by talking to your child about drugs, AIDS, consequences of sex etc. reduces the chance of addiction and unwanted pregnancy greatly in teen agers. CHILDREN DO LISTEN! By not talking and just assuming (I call this a stage of wishful thinking, a stage of denial that your child would never do such things) we could put children to risk. Do not assume. They may be spitting image of you physically, but they have their own mind which needs your guidance.
How to get parents to talk on these issues? This is a tough one, princess. As mentioned earlier, most likely children will not initiate talk. Specially when they are brought up with certain customs like can not talk back to elderly etc. This creates confusion in child's mind about respect for elderly and speaking up your mind. These effect is by- product of such customs. Again, from early age, if it is taught to children how to speak up your mind with respecting elders, when they reach teen age, they would be more interactive.
So, still the question is how to get your parents to talk? If youths are in above situation, they have to INITIATE or break the ice. Yes, there are education programs, literatures etc, but despite of them, child need to talk to parents on these issues. So try to understand these parent's thinking process, give them benefit of doubt, like the same way we are asking these parents to give you youths benefit of doubts. After all, they are your parents, may be living in different world (literally:), may not agree with your ideas and thoughts, but by not communicating, it will widen generation gap and the very positive aspect of Indian culture, family to-getherness, will be lost. Your parents growing up has gone through the same rebelling phase, the difference is, they sacrificed it in name of respect and duty for parents and society.
Yes princess, you are being realistic and have done absolutely right in filling the empty shoe as parents when your brother needed it most. You go girl:-)
Thanx Joseph,
Another great piece of discussion from you. My parents never discussed sex with me when i was teenager. I learned everything from my friends. I think sex education is not only lacking but non existing in Indian community.I think you should write a book on this topic. I am not joking. Keep up the good work...........
Hi Hathoda,
Glad I can help. Consider it as a social service:). Somehow I posted it twice, I guess the first one can be deleted since the second one has one correction. Thanks editor.
The toll free Help line on STD's and planned parenthood in USA is:
1-888-BE-SAFE-1 (1-888-237-2331)
Here, any help given is kept strictly confidential. There are real doctors who help at the clinics supported by this organization. They in fact ask you in detail at what level you want the confidentiality. In other words, your insurance claims or correspondence with you are handle such that it remains confidential.
I was pleasantly surprised and very happy to see Aids informative ads on Indian television. They were very well done, informative and promoted condoms rather then abstainance. That is a real life approach and I'm glad that India has progressed enough to air such ads. Hurray to Indian TV.
Indian television in New York just got taken over by Sony Television. All of a sudden the airwaves were taken over by TV from India and imagine the shock of my aunt when she was watching her regular show and an Indian ad promoting condoms came on. I was happy to see it and secretly gloating now that the Indian community here will also be subject to seeing it and is going to be forced to admit that it exists, Aids and sex among the Indian community.
Any thoughts on this?
Princess,
Like my parents said when my sister and my brother-in-law said "I do" at the wedding. . .IT'S ABOUT TIME.
I'm not picking at you or your culture, but Aids isn't anything to act naive about.
As conservative of a democracy as India is, and having an immense population of a billion people, that many people either being naive or in denial of a deadly disease like AIDS existing in its masses is beyond detrimental! I mean it's decimating populations in the African continent and also in Latin America as well. Not to mention it's hitting hard in North America and Europe. You have to admit Princess, when a population hits a billion, it's kinda too late to talk about abstinance only, don't you think? (:OD)
Nevertheless, everyone from every corner should know about how terminal Aids can be, whether getting by sexual exchange of bodily fluids as well as by intravenous drug use. I don't know what is the drug situation in India or in south Asia, but it doesn't hurt to know all the bases about how this disease escalates. My mother is a nurse and she has told me horrendous stories of many of her terminal patients who suffered and died painful deaths due to complications of full blown Aids.
All SIX BILLION of us worldwide should know and be aware of Aids and apply this knowledge to control its spreading.
Dexter
Dexter,
I'm sad to say that the Indian Health Organization estimates that by the year 2000, 1 in every 20 Indian in India will be infected with the Aids virus!
Hi!!
Please watch AND THE BAND PLAYED ON
Its a very good movie...It will really impress you all...
Rayna and all,
Thanks a lot. I've seen it. It is a good movie. May I suggest two more movies? PHILADELPHIA with Tom Hanks and Denzel Washington. And MISS EVERS BOYS (based on a true story) with Lawrence Fishburne and Alfre Woodward.
Crazyman,
Solict for porn somewhere else. I'm sure you aren't stupid and can read since you bothered to scroll down and post or perhaps you are. This is a valid discussion on an issue. Don't insult our intelligence.
Editor: Can we delete this so it doesn't get all kinds of negative responses?
Alias Dewa
Your spamming this site is noted very seriously.
You are requested NOT to repeat your actions.
If you do we will advise casema.net and other service providers about your spamming.
These are discussion boards not pornographic sites. You are a insensitive fool who cant respect public.
Message from CHOTTI:
What do you thing, in Muslim fundamental countries's situation, where sex is taboo as it is in India, but more strongly. How to deal with it and what policy do you suggest!!!!! For example SUDAN, EGYPT. Do you thing religous poeple can play an important role in this situation. How to convience government to open up like Uganda and Thailand.... This policy can also use can be implemented in India as well, I thing.
Thanks... I would Lie to have some suggestions....
Message from CHOTTI:
What do you thing, in Muslim fundamental countries's situation, where sex is taboo as it is in India, but more strongly. How to deal with it and what policy do you suggest!!!!! For example SUDAN, EGYPT. Do you thing religous poeple can play an important role in this situation. How to convience government to open up like Uganda and Thailand.... This policy can also use can be implemented in India as well, I thing.
Thanks... I would Lie to have some suggestions....
Chotti,
I'm not sure about other South Asian countries however in India there is a massive campaign to teach safe sex. There are not only tv and radio ads but magazine and poster ads aswell to tackle the problems and diseases caused from unprotected sex. Is that what you are talking about?
Anonymous wrote this in the Impotence/Frigidity forum. I'm replying here as this forum is more appropriate for the subject:
>I think sex education is very important to make
>lives more fruitful and less stressful . Lots of
>people are ignorant. Media has a very
>important role to play as indeed is the case with
>sexually transmitted diseases e.g. AIDS
I'll assume that the term 'education' means two things:
(1) Education in schools/colleges to young adults as part of the curriculum.
(2) Education to the public at large through print and electronic media.
It is my contention that in the Indian context both the above forms of education are almost useless as means of disseminating sexual information.
Due to the progressive all-round degeneration of the education system in India over the years, most youngsters leave school / college with what is only a paper degree / diploma, with little real knowledge or even interest in their subjects. The fact is that the education system has been reduced to a system that mindlessly evaluates youngsters for the job market ("the rat race"); in response, youngsters see 'education' as just a series of examinations to be dealt with by rote learning.
Is this what you want to see happening to sexual education?
As for the print/electronic media: A phenomenal number of people in India die of Rabies every year following animal bites. Rabies, for god's sake! A disease which is as old as humanity and for which a cure has been available for years. So much for the media's power of disseminating information. The people I'm talking about here are the poor, illiterate mostly rural folk.
There's no doubt that an organized system of educating people about sex is needed. The question is: what form will such a system take? We have ruled out the two obvious forms. What, then? The added complication here is that sexual matters are delicate by nature.
I vaguely remember having read of some innovative work done by one young gentleman in Thailand to teach people (mostly rural folk) about condoms. Does anybody know more about this?
When I was living in Delhi (am now in Bangalore) one of the women who cleaned our apartment complex (a poor illiterate young married woman in her early 30s) one day asked my wife for advice on "how to not have babies". I think this kind of informal networking is a good way to disseminate information; the pity is that it's reach is limited.
Thoughts, anyone?
got a question
for reasons beyond my control i'm going from the us
to india to get married. anyways..do they do blood tests? before marriage. i mean everyone knows india
is number one in people with AIDS. how do i know
if the girl i'm marrying doesn't have aids.
is it ok to ask for a blood test?
or will the family be offended.
not saying she is a whore..but even if she did
it once, she might have gotten hiv.
i'm serious
any answers?
thanks
mike
If she has Aids you as her husband should inject yourself with a needle.Thats karma
what the •••• are you talking about u stupid idiot.
no name lurker.
•••• you.
if you don't have an answer don't post u ••••••• •••••
indian people get a bad name cuz of idiots like
you.
Mike,
There is nothing wrong with asking for a blood test. Blood tests are used not only to determine that a person is healthy but also compatible. If you are going to check her background and everything else why not also check this. I wouldn't be insensitive and say you want to know if she has aids but you want to check if both parties are healthy. Afterall it would be an arranged marriage. But be prepared to give up some blood aswell and face a lot of opposition.
Mike
You have a good excuse too. In U.S. you have to have a blood test before you can legaly marry. So you can tell your in-laws to be that you need to do this to prepare paperwork etc.
Better safe than sorry.
Hey Mike,
Are you the one from Bay Area? If yes, click this: http://hindustan.net/discus/messages/54/833.html?MondayFebruary720001050pm
I have posted some suggestions and some personal experience on arranged marriage.
Take care
thanks for the advice everyone..
HI Editor,
I am not aware if there is one here, but i think it will be useful if we start a separate discussion on how to avoid unwanted pregnancy by precautionary measures. What course of action to take to avoid accidental pregnancy in its early stage and how to identify it and so...
Atleast it gives us chance to learn about different practices and be on safer side.
Dear Nandu
We comply with your suggestion.
We hope soon we will have more information on this topic.
Thanks.
I am 35 years old and married since 6 years and not had sexual intercourse so far.Psychological impotence. Sex therapy for better sexual communication was suggested. But some how my wife feels that I take the full initiative.
Do you think me having an intercourse with another women will increase confidence to perform.
Anonymous: Please do not do such a thing. If you and your wife are innocent, seek the advice of your father or other trustworthy person. And ask her to speak to her mother or other female relative. It takes time to get used to each other. I assume this is an arranged marriage. If you truly love one another you will look for and find a way. It is disrespectful of your marriage and each other to consider such a thing. Aids, hepatitis, and syphilis and gonorrhea are some other really good reasons to stay away from other partners.
man how old is this discussion?? 3yrs? almost.
well, anyway....there were some things that people said regarding indian parents talking to their children about sex.
I'm 18 now, I live in Los Angeles, US.. been living here for the past ten years..same goes for my mom (except for the age
GET REAL!! I wouldn't want her talking to me about sex. It's quite akward! In the past, I used to crack some jokes (nothing sexual and ever so rarely) regarding women and pregnancy...she used to look at me in this wierd way and say "is that what you are learing on T.V.??!!"
I think now she realized that I'm not so innocent and not know "stuff".
I don't think that people here in US are expected to talk to their children about sex. I think they'd prefer them picking it up somewhere else. Although, they are much free and open to talk about it....like cracking jokes (much worse & dirtier) they won't be telling them the stories about the birds and the bees.
I think parents here expect their children to pick it up from the media and school by the age of 8.
I wouldn't want any akward feelings. I'd much prefer to hear it from someone who is specifically educated in this field. I'd much rather hear it from a Health or Biology teacher. Let's face it...the average joe doesn't no jack squat about STD's because usually they are misinformed/understood about std's.
I found this page looking for info on std's for my health class in college...man, it's going to be one sick paper if my mom reads it
well, I gots to go now...I might be back later.
i m 19 years old guy. i and my friend 've gone to have sex with prostitutes. we had it 4 times.now i m worried that i may be one of the victims of hiv +ve. this worry is making me go panic and depressed.
i would like to know could this fatal happen to me and what are the symptoms for its detection?what are possible tests for it? what should be done about it?
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